The festive season is packaged and presented as a time of joy, celebration and togetherness. We’re surrounded by images of perfect families, overflowing tables and sparkling trees. But for many, the reality feels different. Instead of magic, there’s pressure. Work deadlines pile up, social calendars might overflow, or loneliness creeps in, and the expectation to create a “perfect Christmas” can feel overwhelming. You may feel burnt out, overworked and with the cost-of-living crisis you might be feeling the financial strain more than ever. You’re not alone.
Right now, many families are making impossible choices. The price of everything is going up while wages stay the same. Some may be choosing between paying rent and buying presents, a Christmas ham and putting petrol in the car, feed for their cattle or creating a magical memory for children. These pressures can stir up guilt, shame, embarrassment or feelings of not being “enough” as a parent, partner, or friend. Maybe you can’t afford the long drive home, or the gifts you wish you could give. Maybe you find yourself comparing your Christmas to others who seem to have it all together. Be compassionate with yourself. Try not to compare yourself to others.
Living in regional and rural areas we’re no strangers to long car trips to get where we need to be, but the pressure to visit family hundreds of kilometres away during holidays can be daunting. The high cost of accommodation during the holidays and petrol to get there can leave you feeling less than jolly. Not accounting for the stress of being away from home, especially during bushfire season. This Christmas it’s okay to show up empty handed, or not at all. Enjoy Christmas in a way that aligns with you. Even when everything feels like it’s going wrong, acknowledge the good and what went right. Maybe the good is because you’re able to meet your new nephew for the first time, or because the kids are coming back from boarding school. It might just be putting up the Christmas tree and getting some music in the house. Whatever lights you up this Christmas, take the time to cherish it.
You can do this Christmas different to the last
This year, try and let your loved one’s presence be enough. Share a recipe or a laugh rather than a price tag. Say no to things that are out of your reach and set realistic expectations for yourself and others around you. Choose the events you want to attend and skip the rest. Set boundaries and take the pressure off yourself and others. There are lots of creative ways you can make the festive season magical without spending lots of money and potentially increasing your stress levels.
Try homemade
Pull out your knitting needle, craft something, pot up a plant cutting, paint a picture or write out a family recipe. Homemade gifts are meaningful, and often, even more treasured than items off the shelf. The gifts you think back on most fondly are not the ones with the biggest price tags, but those that showed care and thoughtfulness.
Hit the Op Shops
While it may seem obvious, the op shop has some great gifts for anyone. Find unique, one of the kind gifts or use the materials for your crafting. Best of all, most of the kids’ toys come pre-assembled. Wrap it up, put it under the tree and it’s ready to go.
Reach out
There is support available if you feel your stress bucket getting full of expectations, work deadlines, financial stress and the endless tasks that pile up during Christmas. Reach out to friends, be open and honest with others and yourself with how you’re feeling. Let some of that stress out, schedule in some time for yourself every day, even if it’s just 5 minutes, exercise, maintain a routine and get some sleep. No matter the struggle, support is available.
But most importantly, be aware this Christmas. Aware of yourself and your feelings, and aware that others may have negative feelings and experiences around Christmas. Be mindful of this when visiting or chatting with those you love.
If you’re finding it difficult to cope in the lead up to the festive season, your local RAMHP Coordinator is here to help. You can also download RAMHP’s self-care guide to coping with Christmas.